Her heart stopped beating, and I was frozen at my spot next to her hospital bed. I wasn’t very close to her, even though I spent the last year getting to know her and her life partner. My girlfriend’s elderly aunt was not a shy woman. She was tough as nails, and she was a woman who’s approval was very important to me. It was a strange honor to be present in her final moments.
Earlier in the evening, I was keeping her partner company at their home while her family was at the hospital. These women spent decades together, and exemplified the notion of the old married couple. Their home was well lived-in, and I’d done several handy-man type of tasks around their old house over the past year. Her partner would pass in their home a few weeks later.
Today is June 1st… the first six months of 2024 have been a trip. I can contrast the previous two paragraphs with the following: my girlfriend’s physically challenging pregnancy followed by a difficult labor and delivery. My son was born almost three weeks ago.
That’s also the last time I slept for more than a couple of hours.
Life has been crazy this year. Even though I felt like I was prepared, each twist and turn hit me. From house preparations (including a bathroom renovation), to helping my 16 year old also deal with these changes, to career challenges, and everything in between, I feel surprisingly fine. This could be the lack of sleep talking.
This brings me to blogging and writing. I chose not to share every single detail of the past six months. I felt like some things need to be kept offline. Plus, social media sharing has never been a priority. At the same time, the craziness has not yielded a lot of time for writing. All of my creative energy has been allocated to my day job.
While I’m ashamed to say that fiction writing has taken a bit of a back seat for now, it’s on my mind every day. One of the reasons this blog exists is to keep me accountable, and to share this experience. While this has also fallen by the wayside, I have not given up on writing, and my dream of writing science fiction and sharing it is as strong as the day I decided this was a life goal.
I don’t know what the next six months looks like, but I look forward to them: summer, autumn (finally!) and Christmas. I’ll get back on track with writing while living my life. I’ll work on my relationship while we raise our son, and I’ll help my daughter with the next phase in her life.
Here’s to the next six months.